Ha! Two psychologists debating about semantics with each other! Fun, but, I bet super annoying to any onlookers! LOL!

Yes, using the vitriolic was a bit over the top. The reason that I went to gaslighting is this. There is tremendous emotion around this issue. Many have felt as if held hostage over the past 4 years. We’ve witnessed the deaths of over 240,000+ innocent people from a virus that could have been contained if the administration cared to contain it. Innocent children have been separated from their parents at the border, while their parents were only trying to seek asylum for themselves and their babies from almost certain death in the countries they were running from. As a psychologist, you must know that, even those children reunited with their parents, will likely suffer life-long traumatic symptoms. There are now close to 600 children whose parents cannot be found because there was no attempt to make sure they would be able to reunite families after separation. Racism and antisemitism has been given permission to rear its ugly head and come out proudly into the light. Our allies around the world were becoming less allied with us, not trusting us to have their backs.

On the day of the announcement of the election results, there was a sense of tremendous relief. There was dancing in the streets all over this country and around the world. The traumatic hostage situation has felt like it has come to an end, reason has won, and this 4-year-long episode of the Twilight Zone has ended.

I could literally feel the emotion of relief from the author of this blog. It was not an academic discussion. It was personal for the writer. And it was personal for those of us who feel the same emotions. If you, as a psychologist, were to have a client who told you that they had escaped from their abusive spouse and were now feeling so much relief and joy that they were celebrating, would you tell them to tone it down, that they were being divisive, that it was making those who support the abusive spouse feel badly? The author of this blog does not call those disappointed with the results of the election any names. But, he says, he is joyous and relieved…and feels that he can breathe again, crying tears of joy, and he will not tone that down to make anyone else feel comfortable.

As a woman, I surely know what it’s like to always try to make sure that everyone feels comfortable, even if it’s uncomfortable for me. It’s taken a lot of work to start to break free of that. And, in this situation, it’s not the responsibility of those having felt traumatized and now feeling relief to make others feel comfortable. And, perhaps, I used the wrong word of gaslighting. I don’t think I did, but, if you have a better word for that, I welcome it. In either case, no one should be lectured about how their lack of making others feel comfortable by celebrating out loud about true relief from what is experienced as a long trauma as being divisive.

This has been an interesting debate. Thank you for being polite in our back and forth. Maybe you can send me a message with your actual name and we can continue polite discourse in the future.

Have a beautiful day! It really is a fine day in America!